The purpose of this paper is to explore events and factors that lead to conflict in the home in the Afghan refugee setting, and the current status of the health sector's ability to respond to evidence of conflict. Qualitative interviews were conducted with 20 women of reproductive age and 20 health workers serving these women in an Afghan refugee camp near Peshawar, Pakistan, during the summer of 2004. In particular, this paper analyses women's explanations of how various marriage traditions may be linked to conflict in the home and how the interactions of different family members may be related to conflict. The relationships of women with their parents-in-law and husbands are highlighted in particular, and a model developed to explore the choreography of their relationships and the ways in which these dynamics may encourage or inhibit violence. The perspectives of health workers on the ways in which the health system responds to family conflict and violence are also presented. Finally, this paper provides information that helps to frame the issues of family violence and conflict in long-term refugee populations for intervention designers and those who are working to craft a health sector response to this problem.